Modern motherhood has taken us from a place of nurture and care to overwhelmed and rushed. We pile on responsibilities because the title of “Stay at Home Mom” is no longer a respected one. As a society, we’ve created words like “momtrepreneur” that push the boundaries of what we are supposed to be accomplishing in our free hours even further. Cleaning and caring for an entire home, cooking healthy, sustaining meals for your family, setting aside a small amount of self preservation time for working out, brushing our hair and reading a few short pages is suddenly inadequate.
Unless we can tag on “small business owner”, “full time blogger”, or “work from home” to our job descriptions, there’s a mass assumption that we are home living our best lives. Our babies don’t cry. They don’t demand attention that steals us away from simply showering never mind getting “work” projects done. We are surrounded by children who love to snuggle while we lounge on our stain free sofas while sipping our PSLs. It’s a picturesque fantasy that most of us probably believed until our children made an appearance in our homes.
We take in all of these assumptions and we make them our own. We’re running ragged to keep up. We scroll, double tap, scroll, double tap our way through feeds that boast successes that reach further than simply parenting. The opening of online shops and glamour shots from wedding days leave us wondering what the heck we’re doing with all our time. Afterall, they’re a “momtrepreneur”. We assume that means they don’t have extra help. We assume that they float around in those floral dresses and straw hats with their babies flawlessly strapped to them while they put in the countless hours that it takes to run a full time business. It’s in their title after all. A title that was made up- a title that hasn’t stood the test of time. One that will likely fade as people realize there truly aren’t enough hours in a day to be successful at it all.
Some days we need to step back. We need to realize that sometimes being a good mom is just that- being a good mom. It doesn’t require an extensive list of business goals and ideals. It requires making time for your children. Making sure they’re happy. Being there for them to lay on when they don’t understand why their growing bodies are aching. Not feeling the outside pressure of rushing through their waking hours to make it to quiet nap times. Not being frustrated when their developing minds wake them from their naps an hour early. These are the things that truly matter. These are the things that make you successful at the end of the day.
So next time you’re scrolling through your feed, remember these things. Remember them before you let those best moments of a stranger’s life make you feel less than. I can promise you they’re not doing it alone. And if they are, they’re not doing it all well. These busy lifestyles require sacrifices elsewhere. Don’t sacrifice your time with your precious babes. A successful day of long naps and tear free tummy time may not seem like a success compared to some, but it is. They’re successful and valuable moments that you’ll never get back. Savor those moments. Treasure them and don’t carry bitterness towards them. Find a balance if you must to keep things going, but don’t sacrifice what’s important. Hit the “pause” button where it’s needed. Don’t ever hit the one on your child’s life, though. That’s a part of your life you don’t want to waste. In a world full of busyness, it’s what’s most important. Not fame, business success or wealth. Your child’s sweet life is what counts.
Hold that close to your heart. Carry it with you when you feel small.
Until next time!
Photos by Earthmark Photography