Today’s guest post is from my friend Addie. Addie is one of the most incredible boss lady’s I’ve ever had the pleasure of knowing! The amount of stuff she accomplishes in a week has always astounded me and now that she has two babes by her side, she still manages to kill it as a mom, wife and small business owner. Addie and I were chasing a dream of opening a coffee shop in our little town last summer when we both found out we were pregnant. So with that dream on the shelf, I’m still thrilled to have Addie right around the corner. I’m so excited for play dates with our littles and imperfect moments moments like the ones she’s described below. Meet, Addie!
I love being able to watch my friends become mothers. It’s one of the most beautiful and transformational parts of life and I am so excited for Kriste as she’s starting out this adventure with David and her babe.
I am the furthest thing from an expert in motherhood, but I can share a few of the ways it has changed me and the lessons I’ve learned so far on my journey of raising two babes under 2.
- Nothing will teach you more about God’s love for you than having your own child.
I’ve been amazed at the way my understanding of His unconditional love has changed since becoming a mom. Even on the worst days in our home, full of all the tears, bodily messes, disobedience, sickness, or whatever else may come along, I truly and deeply love these kids. The crazy thing is that God loves us even more than that. And our own stuff can certainly get messier than even the ugliest damage from a two year old.
- Your life with your husband can still be one of your highest priorities.
Conor and I had kids pretty early on in our marriage… and quite honestly, that wasn’t our plan. Like many couples, we had always expected that we would be married for 3-5 years before we entered into our roles as parents. We would have those fun years to travel and build a life with just the two of us before shifting into ‘mom’ and ‘dad’.
Today, we have a two year old, a 4 month old, and we’ve been married for three years. And I think it has been one of the biggest blessings long term. We didn’t get to separate those phases of fun and parenthood like we had seen others do and expected we’d end up the same. Instead, we’ve managed to prioritize doing them at the same time. We still do almost everything we did as a couple, just with our kids – and it’s a total blast. It is not easy to make it out of the house (with our kids) to do the same things that we use to, but we’ve chosen to embrace the craziness and do our best not to loose the things we loved doing together before parenthood.
- Surround yourself with moms who inspire you.
None of us have it together all the time. I’ll be the first to say that I rarely ever do.
Find your tribe of moms who you can cry with on your worst days and celebrate with on the days you feel like you are 100% owning motherhood. The ladies who can totally relate to feeding your kid tortilla chips for lunch on those extra long days when your toddler is crying at the sight of fruit or a sandwich. Friends whose door you can show up to with an unwashed top knot and spit up on your shoulder, just to sit and have that glass of wine you each so obviously deserve.
I’ve learned so much from my messy mama friends. We all have different strengths as moms and equally have things that need the advice of others. Some weeks, it takes a village just to figure out what’s going on with your kid’s poop.
- Our children will not be this little, need us this much, or this love on us so innocently forever.
There are days when I’ve been 8 hours deep in cleaning up various spills, toys, and diapers, and I’ve simply had enough of “mommie, mommie.” Everyone says you’ll miss this stage of childhood, and on those days it simply does not feel like it.
When those times hit, I make a conscious effort to remind myself of all the little things I will miss about this age. Like the way Jase shouts “Whoaaaa TRUCK! Bye truck, bye,” as he waves at even the smallest pickup he sees driving by. And the mischievous little smile he’ll flash my way as he’s trying to sneak out of story time at the library without me noticing. And the way he loves to ‘help’ cook by nearly burning himself on the stove while I’m making dinner, and joyfully playing with his wooden spoon and a potato he’s helped himself to from the drawer.
I definitely don’t love the times when I’m trying to get work done on the computer, and Jase is joyfully climbing over the couch and onto the back of my desk chair. He pulls my hair and leaves his boogers behind as he does it over and over again. I’m working, but he just wants to play with his mama. So I’ve given up on carefully curating my Instagram photos, sometimes it takes me 11 days to respond to an email, and I’ve had to delegate tasks in my business as well our home because I want to prioritize loving on my kids as much as I possibly can while I have the blessing of being home with them.
As a task oriented person, that letting go has been so hard for me. Does it really matter if my husband puts a bowl on the top rack of the dishwasher instead of the bottom? Will anyone but me notice if I don’t vacuum the entire house every single day? Probably not. But I will never regret the times I put my tasks aside to pour into my kids.